How I Went From Obstinance to All In

In this episode, Terri shares her personal struggle with trusting God and awakening to knowing him differently. She describes the four levels of knowing God, what trusting God really means, and 3 reasons why you can dive into a trust relationship with God. Get the Trust Self-Assessment Part 2 for even deeper reflection on how you relate to God.

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Transcript

Welcome to Anchored Not Anxious. This is where you gain a deep belief your life matters to God and discover the anchoring practices to manage anxiety and worry. I'm Terri Hutchinson, your host. In today's episode, I'm sharing my irreverent path to trusting God. The reason I chose to trust him and why I think you can trust him to. When I say I'm a girl who absolutely believed God was full out against me, it's truth. As a child I knew nothing about God, except what my child mind made up. I did not grow up in church or read the Bible. In my twenties, I accepted Christ as my savior, but my dysfunctional and a reverent relationship with God continued. I felt God had failed me in several ways. So, my life mantra had not changed. I believed no one, but me had my best interests in mind. No one, including God. Of course, when things went badly for me because of lousy decisions, I blamed God. I viewed God as this invisible parent tracking what I did and didn't do. The only way to please him was through perfection. When I heard or read the Bible stories detailing God's historical presence with his children and his desire for over a relationship with them I couldn't relate to those stories. Could I trust God with issues in my life, in the present day and time? Of course, the missing element was knowing God in a relationship. I discovered turning toward God changes everything. So how did I go from believing God is a punitive parent to one who sees, hears and loves me deeply. It took time. And an awakening to knowing him differently. Here's three reasons I believe it's worth your time and effort to trust God. Reason One: God never stops pursuing a relationship with you, even when you don't want it. He's always there waiting in the background. Waiting for you to turn toward Him. By knowing God and who he is to you, this helps you discover his passion for you. Reason 2 for trusting God. He knows you like no one else. If you're going to trust God, it is essential to believe he knows you like no one else. You are not some inconsequential speck, on a rotating rock in a galaxy far, far away. You were born for a relationship with God. Like any relationship, the one with God develops from first impressions. Getting to know each other, making yourself vulnerable and then moving toward dependence and trust. Some of us land at first impressions, you believe God exists. And that's, as far as you're going to go. Some of us land at believing God exists and worship him formally or informally, but any genuine sense of knowing God's character, his promises or intent never fully develops. Some of us land at making ourselves vulnerable to God, but then becoming disappointed when he didn't perform to our standards. We decide God failed to show up when and how we expected and the relationship stalls. This is where I stayed for many years. And some of us, and some of us have gotten vulnerable, extended trust to God, depended on Adonia and tracked how he showed up. Getting vulnerable, trusting, dependence and tracking God in your life is part of the trust relationship. This is how you develop a rich history of God being faithful to you when life knocks you down. Where do you see yourself with God? At first impressions? Occasional interactions on your terms? Or, do you want an on-demand performance by God? Or do you want a relationship? In my story, I asked myself if developing and deepening a trust relationship with God was worth my time and effort. I mean, what did I have to lose? In time I learned how much I gained. Here's reason three for trusting God. God shows up and it's trackable, definitely trackable. As you develop and deepen your relationship with Him, you start to see what you couldn't see before. But here's the thing when God shows up, it might not be in the way you wanted. For 27 years, I felt frustrated because I believed God wasn't giving me what I thought I needed. In each difficult circumstance, I searched for what I wanted instead of seeing what God provided. I did not trust God knew better than me. Also no one but God sees me now and in the future. It's a continuum for him. This is why He knows the better path, the wiser decision and its impact for my life now and in the future. Tracking how God shows up is easy if you shift your perspective from what you want or think you need to what God is actually providing. The purpose of tracking God when he shows up. Is to create a timeline of God's faithfulness to you. The rich history of his faithfulness to you, anchors you when tough times hit. Knowing He is with you and for you fortifies your trust-hope anchor and you are less likely to drift away into anxiety and worry. All right. Let's recap the reasons you can trust God. Reason One. Because God never stops pursuing a relationship with you, even when you don't want it. The biblical accounts of those who trusted God shows you the power of a relationship with him and how He is for you and with you. Reason Two. God knows you like no one else. Being vulnerable with God seeking him, propels you into the relationship you were born for. Reason Three. How and when God shows up in your life is trackable. If you keep a log of when God showed up and what he provided, you create a history of his faithfulness in green you on the rough road of adversity. The deeper the relationship, the higher the trust factor. Thank you for listening. And remember go to the podcast website to find the free worksheet Trust Self-Assessment Part 2. It helps you evaluate your trust factor with God. You can get even more content through the Anchored Not Anxious monthly newsletter. Click on the link to subscribe. Until next time.